Monday, July 21, 2008

The Baby



Welcome Mikey!!

Refuge

Where do I take refuge? is my refuge in the Lord as the Psalmist's is? I think not. i take refuge in mindless games, mindless shows, idle chatter. I don't feel the need for refuge. I don't see an impending storm. Does that mean there is no need for refuge? Am I ignoring the storm? pretending it doesn't exist? or is that I have sought refuge elsewhere and think that I am safe.

What is "refuge"?

ref·uge
1. shelter or protection from danger, trouble, etc.: to take refuge from a storm.
2. a place of shelter, protection, or safety.
3. anything to which one has recourse for aid, relief, or escape.
—Synonyms 1. security, safety. 2. asylum, retreat, sanctuary, haven, stronghold.

How does one take refuge in the Lord? In Christian circles, we talk about these vague concepts as though they are not vague.

When you take refuge from a storm, say a tornado, you go to your basement (or where ever) and wait the storm out. The storm does not disappear because you are in the basement - you just don't feel the full effect of the storm. After the storm has passed, your life might be completely changed.

Refuge. hmm.

What are the storms in my life? how can I seek shelter until they pass? Should I seek shelter?

Or do we only need to seek refuge when there is a storm and/or danger? is there danger everywhere and i am just being naive to think that refuge is not needed.

refuge can't be hiding from issues...

safety, security, what is the third one. you need to feel safe, secure, and ?? oh yes, significant. that is a topic for another day.

P.S. I'm a grandma. baby picture will be posted shortly.

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Anguish

"I am weary with my sighing; every night I make my bed swim, I dissolve my couch with my tears." What is the cause of this anguish? the author is pining away, grieving. Since the narrative does not say, could it be an illness? the loss of a loved one? a broken heart? or the recognition of a great wrong caused by the writer?

When I was caught, when my true nature was exposed, I was despondent because I knew that I could not go back and "fix" things. The flaw was readily apparent and there was nothing I could do to erase what had been "written".

Let me paraphrase: I am tired of crying; every night my pillow is soaked with my tears; my couch has irreparable water damage. This is a soul in agony.

Is there resolve?